May 6, 2008
Last year was my first official Mothers Day.
I woke up that Sunday morning anticipating a special day, but when I rolled over to face Scotty, the first thing he said to me was, “I didn’t get you anything for Mothers Day.” Scotty isn’t usually a jerk, but on that day he was. I wasn’t necessarily expecting anything (because Scotty doesn’t present me with gifts for any occasion), but I was hoping for a sincere, “Happy Mothers Day!” and maybe some breakfast in bed or something. Instead, Scotty rolled over and went back to sleep, so I went downstairs and prepared my own breakfast while bawling my eyes out and making sure to bang the pots and pans loud enough to keep him awake.
I shouldn’t be telling this story to the internet, but you need to know what happened last year so you can further appreciate the steps I took to avoid this scenario this year.
It turned out that Scotty had wanted to get me a porch swing for the back yard, but he never had tome to go to the store and get it. Scotty and I had a nice long talk about the issue in which I explained to him that he should have just told me that. We discussed better ways in which he could have presented that information to me. I made sure to tell him how pissed off upset I was when he went back to sleep, and I had to go downstairs and make my own breakfast.
Now the question is: Did Scotty learn anything from this experience?
To prevent a repeat of last year’s traumatizing holiday, I - being the selfish good wife that I am- made a list of things that would make me really happy on Mothers Day and placed it on the seat of Scotty’s truck. It’s a pretty simple list including gift ideas and nice, little things that he can do. I don’t expect a gift, of course, but I expect something. Some kind of gesture of love and appreciation for the hard work I put in as the mother of his child.
Will it work?
I’ll be sure to report back to you.
May 6, 2008 at 8:06 am
Good for you! Hope it works like a charm!
May 6, 2008 at 8:31 am
Wait, he doesn’t present you with gifts for any occasion? Give me his cell number. He needs a stern talking to.
May 6, 2008 at 9:31 am
Like they say, the key to a good relationship is communication. As nice as it would be for him to anticipate your every need and whim, sometimes you’ve just got to spell it out loud and clear!
One of my friends once made her husband re-enter the room, listen to her story again, and this time, give the appropriate reaction. I thought that was hilarious.
May 6, 2008 at 10:46 am
Sometimes it just comes right down to putting it on paper for them. Your husband and my husband must be brothers, cause I still have the same problem. A few years ago however, I have taken matters into my own hands and have had to purchase my own mommies day gifts. If I didn’t, I would wake up Sunday morning with a bagel w/cream cheese(I do like that), but as a gift I would most likely expect to get some type of tool like a saw or a sander, ya, how romantic and thoughtful. So I tip my hat to you and say good for you and all women out there who know what they want and know how to get it. Happy Mommies Day!!!
May 6, 2008 at 11:45 am
Hopefully he read it, rather than just sitting on it (unless you think he will pick it up by osmosis?). I keep reminding Rob that MD is next sunday, and what does he have planned? I know that he has plans, I just hope he sees them through.
May 6, 2008 at 12:52 pm
I made my expectations clear when my son was born (Nothing big, flowers and a card that had something more than a signature).
NOPE.
However, after he saw how much it hurt me, he had a gorgeous gold necklace designed with my children’s birthstones in it when my last son was born.
I REALLY hope that your plan works out, but if it shouldn’t, don’t give up. Sometimes these things take awhile to achieve.
May 6, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Does he read this blog?
Okay, so my first Mothers Day happened weeks after giving birth and was ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I remember I want to church and told May how crappy Mother’s Day was. She had been a Mom for a while. She just nodded her head and was all “welcome to the Crap Club!”
Tru dat.
(Oh, and I also had to speak in Church that Sunday. So yeah, just given birth, my birthday, Mothers Day, AND speaking. NICE.)
May 8, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Good for you. I need to try this for other occassions I think. I remember my mom used to get mad at my dad for not even really acknowledging Mother’s day…he used to tell her, “well, you’re not my mother.” grrrr.