On Friday, a really good friend of mine from high school got married. Sweet Pete the Ladies’ Treat -as we called him back in 9th grade- met the girl of his dreams and got hitched just in time to pack his bags and move to Florida to sell security systems for the summer (The Wife is going with him, don’t worry).

Being a man, SPTLT didn’t put forth the effort to track down old friends to invite them to his wedding. The only reason I was invited was because I talked to him on the phone in December and, upon learning of his engagement, insisted that he send me an invite. I was only 45% sure that he would follow through, since he had five months to forget about me before the invites needed to be sent, but to my surprise, the invitation showed up in the mail a few weeks ago.

After nagging SPTLT to invite me to his wedding, I had to show up. The problem: The reception was an hour away, and SPTLT didn’t invite any of our mutual friends so I had no one to go with. I know that some of you are thinking What about Scotty? Yeah, Scotty could have gone with me, but I didn’t want to make him.

So what did I do? I decided to invite people to SPTLT’s wedding.

Now, in many cultures, this would probably be unacceptable, but in Utah, receptions are typically held in church gyms and include chocolate chip cookies for refreshments. In short, I knew it wouldn’t be a big deal if I brought two friends with me who I know SPTLT would have invited if their addresses had fallen out of the sky into his lap.

Leelee, Chelley, and I love going on road trips, so we piled in my Santa Fe and tried to make it to the Land Of Cow Poo on a quarter tank of gas (we made it). As we cruised I-15, Chelley suddenly yelled out, “Oh my gosh! A buffalo!”

I looked to my right, and there he was…

For the next 45 minutes, we rode along side this stuffed bison head, which we lovingly named Buffalo Pete in honor of the groom.

If Buffalo Pete isn’t an accurate portrayal of life in Utah, then I don’t know what is. The only unfortunate part of the journey was our inability to commandeer Buffalo Pete and abandon him in SPTLT’s gift pile (because SPTLT would have loved boarding a plane to Florida with a bison in tow).